So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
