I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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