Can i not drive my cunt home
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize