i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
What a dumb baby whore.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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