I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I could fuck to npr.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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