He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
