that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Do vagina's smell?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
