Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize
