Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize