Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize