I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize