We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
id be glad to
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Randomize
