What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
