69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I just found a bag of teeth...
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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