Buhtt sex?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
