Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
