I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
