i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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