Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
