I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
