non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize
