I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Randomize
