We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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