Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
tell me about the eggs
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize