you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
