she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
