Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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