Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Randomize
