And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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