make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Randomize
