R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
