is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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