Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I have surprise drugs for everyone
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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