the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
