Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
