Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
