You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize