so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
