He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
