We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
