I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
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