weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
