So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
