I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
