did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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