If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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