Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
