i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
is wine microwaveable?
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just want to make out with him forever
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
