Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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