the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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