Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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