I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
My breasts were aching with rage.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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