so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Actions speak louder than pants.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
